Over the past few weeks I’ve been digging into topics that if you work on, will help you build an amazing relationship with yourself.
In case you missed them, they were acceptance, trust, vulnerability, honesty, kindness, and forgiveness.
Today I’m finishing off this series with love.
What’s an amazing relationship without love, right?
I hear too often from the people I work with that they hate themselves. Maybe not all the time, but after they binge they certainly do. Or maybe they don’t hate themselves as a person, but they hate their body.
Not only does feeling hate not feel good, but also, hating will not bring forth positive action.
It makes you feel bad and as I’ve talked about before, when you feel bad, you do bad.
If you hate someone else, it’s highly unlikely that you’re going to do something nice for them or try to help them.
Same goes for yourself. Hate yourself, hate your body, and taking action to make yourself better most likely won’t happen.
You can’t hate yourself better.
If you’re stuck in hate, loving yourself may seem very far away or maybe impossible to get to.
But it’s not impossible. You have the capacity to love and you are lovable.
But you can’t just jump right away from I hate myself to I love myself. Love is too unbelievable at this moment.
So start with liking yourself.
What do you like about yourself? Pick one thing. There is at least one thing and don’t stop searching until you find it.
Then once you do, find 4 more things.
Pick one thing you like about your body. It doesn’t even have to be a physical aspect, it can be something your body can do like walking or speaking or listening. And the physical can be your fingernails or your hair.
Then look for more.
It’s easy to sit in hate and focus on the fact that you binged or that you have the body you have right now. But it’s time to shift that focus if you want to do something about it.
Just because you’re a person who binges or that your body is this size and shape doesn’t mean everything else you’ve got going for you doesn’t matter.
Your binge eating is just one thing that you do. It doesn’t define you. Your body looks however it does right now and it’s not the only thing that defines you.
Create your own definition for yourself.
Are you a nice person? A generous, caring, thoughtful person? Are you a good listener? Friendly? Fun? Reliable?
What are your qualities that you like? Make those parts of you that you like your defining qualities and when you think about yourself, think about those.
What things are you choosing to focus on that you like about yourself or your body? Share them with me by emailing me at info@coachkir.com. Also, tell me how you’ve been doing with incorporating the other topics I’ve been talking about in recent weeks!
